February 2012
260 posts
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I can’t handle your problems. I have to deal with my own and you making me feel bad for not being 100% there for you puts me down. I’m sorry, you’re not the only one dealing with depression and suicidal thoughts and familial problems, and you’ve got a boyfriend and 2 friends that would kill for you, and a dad who loves you more than anything. I don’t have that even if...
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I’m to lazy to write a paragraph about last night.
We went to M.’s
30minutes bus ride to get to K’s
Where the fuck was that
Russians everywhere
Stop giving us shots ugh
L. was too cute
I think he likes me
30minutes bus ride
A. was way too drunk
Slept at N.’s place with R. and L.
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I want something special with someone. Not a relationship. Nothing official, nothing with a label. Just something casual. I want someone I can cuddle with, have sex with. Watch movies and pizza with. Talk about books and listen to music with. A friend, a confident. But no jealousy. No serious feelings. No promises.
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I’m definitely calling my children Zelda, Lavande and Dante.
Today I:
Cleaned up the building’s staircases
Took a nap
Baked brownies with peanut butter frosting
Watched documentaries about propaganda during WWII
Applied nail polish, twice.
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These last 24hours were so fuck fantastic.
Last night was spent at D’s house and we did MDMA. It was so fucking amazing, it was like complete utter bliss. I’ve never been so great in my whole life, I just couldn’t stop stoking everything and lying down with the girls. There were 25 people and some I didn’t even know. Everyone would be like “Who’s doing MDMA? Oh...
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I don’t want to grow old. Very, very old. What’s the point of it? I could do with live a little, live a few decades then die. I don’t want to be old, I don’t want my memory to fade away, my strenght to leave me, my mind to erase itself. I don’t want to be a weight for myself and others.
I always knew I wouldn’t live old and in a way it reassures me and...
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